Sometimes you gotta stick to your rules, sometime it is good to listen to mates. I am normally not an “on tour” guy when it comes to mu-sick but after the Haermorrhoids show on the MS Hedi one of me mates said something like “lets see them again tomorrow, i’ll pick you up from the train station and drive down“.
And on the spot i said Sir, Yes Sir!
Schneverdingen it was. South of the mighty river Elbe, deep in the Lüneburg Heath and once occupied by the lovely Danes (1712-1715 that was). And the only time i was there was a fun occasion, back in the summer of 1988:
The magical FCSP had just been promoted to the first flight and needed to prepare for the Bundesliga, up to and including hiring new and impactful players. Came the day where the local press was full of praise of some Eduard “Edu” Eranosyan from Lokomotiv Plovdiv. With 299 games and 140 goals as a track record he was announced as Der Bomber von Lokomotive Plovidiv. That lured me and a mate down south into the Osterwald Stadium … we needed to see this magic striker.
Came the game a guy with both knees bandaged entered the pitch and to our astonishment the magic name was paired by the announcer with the shirt number that guy had.
Long story short: He was miserable to say the least, taken off at halftime and was not hired by the FCSP. He went to play elsewhere in Europe (having a single good season in Portugal with 22 goals). So much for the press pressure to buy the superstar that keeps us in the Bundesliga.
Somewhat this is not a detour, the local Pub The Haermorrhoids where set to play is an obvious outlier in the region: Home of an FC St. Pauli Fan Club and home to very different mu-sick (in the eyes of the locals).
Welcome to the Blue Bird, Schneverdingen.
Upon seeing the program we got tempted to return to Pariahlord (cool name) but Stoner Rock? Come on!
The place is simply a small pub in a residential area, making us wonder about noise concerns from the surrounding neighbors. But i guess the owner has a good relationship and he also makes sure that it does not get too late.
Kick-off was at 21:00 and The Haermorrhoids took the stage naah took the floor. One of the 3 small rooms was converted to “backstage”, the entry room was the stage and the 3rd room with the bar was … bloody hell, packed with locals. Many regular, older, country side pub goers.
A bit of a difficult and sub-optimal setup for touring world stars to come but hey, it is these types of gigs that you need to have under the belt in large number to excel on the big stages.
The Haermorrhoids (Blue Bird, Schneverdingen, 29.03.2024 (c) gehkacken.de 2024
They took the same set as on the MS Hedi and simply went on to deliver.
I guess within 13 minutes they had bashed out 9 songs and left some of the locals blasted away. They got some applause and some people even cheered them up.
The obvious question How did it sound? – it sounded like 1984:
Under the circumstances (more a rehearsal room setup than a show setup) it was actually not too bad, a wee bid annoying was that people entering the pub actually had to side-step the 2nd guitar (or wait for a break).
The Haermorrhoids (Blue Bird, Schneverdingen, 29.03.2024 (c) gehkacken.de 2024
Whereas The Haermorrhoids the day before on the MS Hedi where tight, together and without any slippage … Schneverdingen was not turning out in the same way as a perfect set.
Not sure if it was the setup or if they relaxed too much prior to the show, i guess to an extend it was like a professional footie team in a pre-season game away at an amateur side. Not everything works, energy and concentration levels tend to go down the bog.
Still, they finished with some extras and my loveliest song, Overdose:
Ups, not all ready for DNA.
That is what you can only iron out with much more frequent touring and getting yourself fully into it. Which i trust they will do, they got 8 days to go from here (conquered Schneverdingen, next the World).
Neat side step south from the big city, utmost nice location with friendly people and should i ever end up in Schneverdingen and thirsty, this is where i would go.
It was now 22:00 and we simply jumped back into the car. Our driver got safely back to the train station and i jumped onto the S-Bahn and was home in like a breeze – thanks for the perfect service mate and thanks for the persuasion, you are indeed a sales man!
And The Haermorrhoids? Hopefully play better stages, with plenty of listeners turning to fans and come home exhausted, all merch sold, still together and an even tighter outfit that takes on the World next.
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