The worlds best band (at least according to me mate Luke, who is someone i would blindly trust as he is a lawyer by trade) seems also the worlds most unorganized lot, be it timing the record release party for the evening when all of St. Pauli is being pillaged by Schlager Fans (or is being annoyed, pissed upon, vomited into – choose your chore) during the annual Schlager Move. Bad timing.
Equally bad was setting the start of the procedure via a Facebook announcement to 1900 (where the Komet almost would have been unreachable by anyone with a sane mind).
From where i sit also having this at the Komet would be underselling the abilities of The Harmorrhoids but on that day i guess it was not even sold out. Many of the regular supports where already en-route to Bergamo for Punk Rock Raduno #6, where this record release party would have been a worthy addition (as me and other locals desperately want this band to break big internationally).
As support they had invited Neon Bone from Münster, like minded when it come to #ramonescore. They are around in the genre a wee bit longer and have plenty of releases out. They kicked off around 22:30 and graced the Komet with medium tempo and sugar coated #ramonescore.
Neon Bone (Komet, Hamburg, 08.07.2023 (c) gehkacken.de 2023)
What they do get done quite neat is multi-vocal harmonies and they center many songs alongside that ability. And that sugar coated thingy most of the time delivers a love song (at least as far i was able to pick up the lyrics) and i would guess it is generally in the category of enjoyable mu-sick (without getting me registered as a fan).
Here is one of these:
I guess they where a fitting (and to the extend they musically rounded off the evening) partner in crime for them Haermorrhoids. Once they were done with their rather short & crisp set they grabbed a towel and lined up in front of the stage to praise the worlds best band.
The Haermorrhoids not only premiered their new record, they also premiered their new Bass player Martin to me (as i missed an earlier show in April), who joined after the recording of the record was completed (as Jan moved to focus on his other band).
And brave as brave could be – or better bold as bold must be (for the best band of the world) they choose to play the new record (just leaving poor Captain Isolation out) in full first thing:
And this is how they kicked into their set (after some setup problems as Yannik had to be both drummer and sound man (as he is resident sound man at the Komet)):
Bang! Off it went into a perfect and fast set of these soon-to-be classics. The sound though was never perfect, but down in that tiny cellar below the Komet Bar it rarely is anyway. What they won over though immediately was the audience, plenty of happy folks singing and dancing away.
The Haermorrhoids (Komet, Hamburg, 08.07.2023 (c) gehkacken.de 2023)
And what fueled the lot? It is timeless beauties like “Timewarp Incest“, the so far untold alternative story line within “Back To The Future”. Sure some expert moaners will moan sounds like … Riverdales, Queers, Screeching Weasel or what the fuck else – but that won’t change the position of The Haermorrhoids being at level with those. And better.
Go – here is “Timewarp Incest”:
What was a feel during the show turned out to be true by validating numbers at home:
Where the first LP clocked in with 20 Songs at 00:32:52 the new one pushed the boundary to 16 Songs at 00:28:20 – thus moving the songs from average 1:38 to 1:46, all still within (and much nearer) to the magic “around the 2:00 mark” as set by experts like Undertones and Ramones.
The songs are a wee bit longer, a wee bit more complex and … a wee bit better without loosing punch.
The Haermorrhoids (Komet, Hamburg, 08.07.2023 (c) gehkacken.de 2023)
What also was fun to see is that somehow the new LP reads like a concept album, both song rooster, cover (expert design by Patt Whelan at Thrillhaus!) and lyrics – pretty much themed into one direction. As a concept i do like it, if all of that is really purpose (more than coincidence) than hats off to the lot for making that silly but grand idea real. That would make the record an extra gem!
The Haermorrhoids (Komet, Hamburg, 08.07.2023 (c) gehkacken.de 2023)
Fun also to see the old bass player upfront in the audience to party along to the tracks he used to play (and recorded) and cheering up the band (and the new bass player) along the way.
And as on every occasion they finished their set with my personal favorite – so here is “Overdose” yet again:
Great set, shitty light, no oxygen, loads of sweat, not really perfect sound, too small stage and hopefully loads of records sold. But whatever – the record release show simply confirmed that Hamburg has nurtured a mighty force ready to take on #ramonescore anywhere on #planetramone – can someone please hook them into a successful tour of the US, followed by more shows in Japan and say … Italy.
#worldtouragesponsor anyone?
Me mate Luke for the remainder of the evening was unstoppable (as long as had a Jever in his hand – and i rarely see him without) to point out that they are the best band of the world. I have to admit that they are currently the most non-German band around in Hamburg and at par with classic #ramonescore bands from the US and Italy, say.
As ever when a band convinces me live i take home vinyl (or other merch), at the Koment i actually took in the new LP even ahead of the show, as some few where around of the red vinyl version (100 pressed?), so my greedy #recordcollecorsarepretentiousarseholes self was very very satisfied.
The Haermorrhoids - At The Earth's Core (released 08.07.2023)
The stroll home though was a pain – still to many Schlager fans pissing, vomiting and littering in our path. So me and me mate Thomas more or less ran the beauties home in record time to Altona-Altstadt, where it was a little less filthy and loud (but still annoying).
Get your own version via Monster Zero Records, Mom’s Basement Records or directly form the band. It is fucking worth it!
